Get to know an Ilonggo

If you are traveling to the islands of Iloilo or Negros in the Visayas, or you would just like to get to know an "Ilonggo," read on.

Their one peso is pisos
Their bathroom has at least one lugod (a rock with rough surface used the same way as a luffa) (or one for every family member).
Their mother makes them drink Mirinda or Royal Tru Orange when they have a fever, which is supposed to make them feel better.
Sinamak (a local condiment made of vinegar and lots of chili) is a staple on their dining table (the best Ilonggo invention if you ask me... it was even banned on airplanes long before 911)
Their toyo (fish sauce)  is patis and their patis (soy sauce) is toyo.
Their hipon (prawn) is "lokon."
Their alamang (shrimp) is "hipon."
Their kanto (street corner) is "bangga."
They use atsuete (achuete) for their adobo and refer to pinaksiw (fish in vinegar sauce) as pinamalhan
Their daily meal will likely include laswa (soup made with green leafy vegetables) , kbl (kadyos, baboy, langka), ginat-an nga tambo with tugabang and okra, ginat-an nga munggo (monggo beans with coconut milk), linutik, apan-apan (a relish or appetizer made from kangkong stems), etc.
November 1 means eating ibus, suman, suman latik, kalamay-hati, bayi-bayi, valenciana or other native delicacies with glutinous rice and coconut milk.
They call those they love palangga, pangga, langga or Ga.
They call their siblings or cousins inday, nonoy or toto... the househelp may call them the same.
They call those who are older than they are manang or manong.
They catch the attention of sales attendants by calling them "day" or "to."
Their childhood games include tumba patis, taksi', panagu-ay, balay-balay, ins, tin-tin baka, holanes, etc.
They used to be (or still are) scared to go out at night lest they meet the aswang (vampire-like creature), tik-tik (a type of aswang), tayhu, kapre (evil-giant that lives on trees), kama-kama, morto (ghosts), etc.
Their grandparents read Yuhum magazine.
They call a person, thing, place, and event "kwan" when they forget it (si kwan, ang kwan, sakwan).
They understand that "Particulars Keep Out" sign means outsiders keep out.
They use words such as "ahay" (expression of pity, grief, empathy), "yuga" (expression of disbelief, surprise), "ambot ah" (to say they don't know, expression of impatience).
They often start their sentence with "ti."
They say goodbye by saying "halong."
Their favorite cusswords are "linte" (if they are slightly pissed off), "lilinti-an" (if they are now really pissed off) and finally "yodip*ta" (if they are pissed off big time).

Familiar? Now you know them better.

DISCLAIMER:
a friend forwarded to me an email similar to the one above and I found it amusing, so I decided to post it here (with a few tweaks).